With the retirement and passing of Judge John Garavan our courts were robbed of a source of witticisms and off-the-cuff remarks that made his courtrooms enjoyable places to be. Here are some examples of the remarks of the late Judge Garavan that graced our pages in the past decade.
“I hear from respectable young men that they can't meet nice respectable girls in these nightclubs. The girls they meet there are dreadful, at least that is what I am told.''
Sitting in court to hear an application for an extension at the Cuba nightclub, the judge said he had been told by respectable boys that there were only dreadful girls in the city's nightclubs. He later said that he did not mean to cause any offence and was merely commenting on something he had been told.
“It was a briefless one, I'd say” - He replied after a solicitor said that his client's late night backside baring was just a brief exposure.
“Maybe he thought he was Gene Kelly singing in the rain” - quipped Judge Garavan after he applied the Probation Act to a Connemara man caught swinging an umbrella at passersby in the city.
“If a man has a row with his wife, he should bring the dog for a walk, not drive the car - " he said after hearing a case in which a man drove off in a huff at speed after arguing with his wife.
“You’d have been able to set up your own symphony orchestra,” he told a Bohermore man who stole 16 guitars and a clarinet froma Galway city shop.
“Anybody who buys these tablets and sells them on to others should be strung up” he said after hearing the case of a local ecstasy tablet dealer
“He might have been better if he gave his girlfriend his last Rolo,” commenting on the case of a Newcastle man who bought his girlfriend an old car and signed her name on the ownership form, landing himself before the court.
“Throwing a knife at someone is one way of getting their attention allright" speaking on a case in which a Rahoon man said he threw things at his girlfriend to get her attention.
“If you were drinking, you would buy it a pint at a time and not go out and buy a full barrel” - He told a city man who was caught in possession of cannabis which he said was for his own use but was enough to last more than a month.
“You should be more discriminating in your choice of female company in future.” Judge Garavan told a Kerryman who was before him on a charge of handling stolen money which the man claimed had been slipped into his pocket by a lady friend.
“With spring coming up, you’d want to watch it, because a young man’s thoughts turn to things in spring that young women have been thinking about all winter.” Judge Garavan imparting some love advice to a young Spiddal man who told the court he forgot to produce his motor insurance and driving licence because he had nothing on his mind lately but women.
“Was it windy or cold that night?”Judge Garavan asked a Mayo student after the student pleaded guilty to exposing himself after his friends had stripped him on a night out.
“If one is completely deprived and at the bottom of the scale in this consumer society, it must be impossible not to be tempted to steal.”
Judge Garavan sympathising with the plight of a refugee who was facing a second conviction for shoplifting.
“You’d have to have some sort of sneaking regard for them, doing what they did.” Judge Garavan admits a bit of hidden admiration for the two men who were before him accused of trying to remove a clamp from their car. However, despite this, he fined them both.
“Farmers are not in the habit of leaving ammunition behind them like that.” Judge John Garavan admitted that he did not believe the “yarn” spun by a city hairdresser who was found with a handgun and five rounds of ammunition in his car. The man had said that he had given a seat to two farmers and they must have left it behind them.
“The ordinary people of Galway have been extraordinarily kind to me. They’ve given me cards and letters and even pounds of tea.”
Judge John Garavan speaking on his last day in court after more than two decades of judicial service in Galway.
“I know I should be sad. I’ve spent over 21 years in Galway and I’ve enjoyed every minute of it. To be appointed to the bench is such a privilege and it was an honour almost 30 years ago. I can truthfully say that I have never lost the sense of awe and privilege that I had then and I still have. If I was to live my life again I wouldn’t change a thing. I leave on a high”
