I could give you all the text book definitions but I won’t. Every coach out there seems to have a different definition. Coaching originated in the states within sports and they soon realised that same principles could be applied to business and education indeed any area of life where you wish to improve performance.
A coach is someone who –
A Listens to your “Thing” your issue, your problem, your dilemma.
B They feedback to you what you have said regarding that dilemma.
C They ask you what you would like to achieve or what outcomes you want to achieve in regard to the issue or problem.
D They prompt you and guide you with specific questions so that you can come to a point where you gain clarity with an issue. The light bulb comes on. They may well ask difficult questions, but I always ask a client at the consultation stage can I have permission to ask the questions I feel that I need to ask. They can stop at any point or refuse to answer. Often when there is a silence you get more information as you know you have probably hit a nerve. This may require further investigation or time. Often they may not be in the right place to continue or may not be comfortable but you can always be come back to it later on. Body language will tell you a lot about what the person is thinking at the time. In coaching the client finds their own solutions.
What coaching is about is finding your own solutions, answers and determining your own result. You all have the solutions within you, you all know in your heart where you need to go and what you need to do. But sometimes you need a little push, prod, or prompt to get you on the right track. But ultimately you find the solutions not the coach.
This gives back all the power to you. This raises your personal confidence. Yourself worth and self esteem. You say to yourself “Idid that” “I achieved that”, “I made that happen”. We are not talking about moving mountains only hills. With all small steps you take you count them as successes and you can keep a success log of all the things you achieve. The problem with most clients and it is not a problem as such is that they are afraid to take a step out of their comfort zone. They are so happy in there. Or perhaps they are miserable but it is safe, they know it well. If they step outside of their comfort zone they have two fears – The first one is fear of failure, but often what is worse is the fear of success. Some people are afraid of success.
A very important part of the coaching process is helping the client to clarify goals and objectives. A goal is only a dream with a deadline. Goals need to be SMART goals by this we mean –
Specific clearly defined, with explicit clarity. So for example if you say you want to increase your income. That is not specific you cannot measure it. Now if you said I want to increase my income by ten percent that is specific.
Measurable can you measure your success ? Can you measure whether or not you have achieved your goal. How can you measure it? With specifics.
Achievable will you be able to achieve this goal? You may not be able to achieve it currently but perhaps with time and a model mentor to guide you it may well be achieved. Remember almost nothing is impossible.
Realistic and relevant. Is this goal realistic can you do it. Is it a pipe dream? Often you will doubt yourself before you start. You should explore your options and investigate all your avenues before you allow your dream to be put away in the dead box, and don’t let dream stealers take your dream away. Two points – you can if you think you can. If you meet a roadblock take a detour and remember you do not know what you can achieve until you try.
Time based. Your goals must have a clearly allocated time frame. Do not say “I will buy that new car sometime”. Visualise it, smell it, see yourself driving it and give it an exact date by which you will acquire it.
Goals need to be –
1 Set
2 Written down
3 Action taken on them
4 Reviewed
5 Re-planned
Change your time line if you need to. All research shows that those people who wrote their goals down achieved much more success and wealth and than those who did not. So write it down.
Have a goal book – Give each goal a page. Give it a date by which it is to be achieved. Ask yourself what the benefits of achieving this goal are and what the disadvantages are. What resources will I need and what areas of my life will suffer while I try to achieve this goal. Because something will suffer.
Ensure your goal book is a beautiful book one that you are happy to look at. Put pictures in there of places you want to visit, peoplewho inspire you. Make a bucket list. A bucket list is a list of all the things you want to do, places you want to go to and things you may want to acquire before you die.
Ask this question of yourself – If I am 43 now and live to 83 how long have I got left? Work out the maths –
40 years x 365 days a year = 14600 days
That in month’s 480 month’s not a lot is it when you think of it that way. Coaches can help you clarify what is important in your life. You may not know or you may think you know but a coach will help you improve your life dramatically. Why not become one of life’s super achievers, hire a professional coach. Maintain a positive mental attitude always. Until we chat again, live, enjoy and treasure life and all that it brings your way and remember every problem comes with a gigift, and to take a leap and the net will appear.
