What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Getting a good cup of tea when you’re out somewhere.
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
So many well-remembered figures are rich white men, and the past was not a nice time to be anything other than that. Let’s go with ‘literally any woman who had to live through history’.
Which living person do you most admire?
I take a huge amount of inspiration from my peers. There are women and queer people across the world creating new work and examining old ways of doing things. They’re building a better world.
Which is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Deplore is a very strong word. I’m fairly useless at getting out of bed.
What is your greatest extravagance?
If there’s a new book I want, nothing will stop me buying it.
What is your favourite journey?
My *least* favourite journey was spending 10 hours in the front cab of a small transit van with my father and two very angry cats, while moving home earlier this year. Anything since then has been an absolute dream.
On what occasion do you lie?
Sometimes people give me recommendations for podcasts to listen to and I say, ‘I’ll give it a listen!’ Reader, I will not.
Which living person do you most despise?
I’m not a huge fan of the British Empire, does that still count as alive?
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My cat Bear. He is my best friend. Also my cat Tonks. She is my other best friend.
When and where were you happiest?
In the sea. No, under the sea.
Which talent would you most like to have?
Teleportation, definitely. Or accents.
What is your current state of mind?
Nervous. Hungry. Hopeful.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Teaching my friend Dave how to make a perfect cup of tea.
If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what do you think it would be?
A ghost and haunt all of my friends.
What is your most treasured possession?
My huge piles of gold.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Whacking your elbow off of something really hard.
What is your favourite occupation?
Roller skating.
What is the quality you most like in a man?
Basic competence.
What is the quality you most like in a woman?
The ability to say ‘I already said that’.
Who are your favourite writers?
Maggie Nelson, Alexander Chee, Harry Josephine Giles, David Mitchell, Sarah Perry
What is your motto?
Is there anything to be said for saying another Mass…?