Prostate cancer risk
Q This was the first Christmas where our 85-year-old father’s Alzheimer’s disease has progressed to the point that he did not recognise many of his family members. As his primary caregiver, how can I arrange future family gatherings without become even more stressed-out than I am already?
A It may be difficult to look forward to special occasions when a beloved family member is not himself. We turned to the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America for suggestions:
Communicate concerns
In advance of celebrations, be candid with family and friends about your father's condition and your concerns, and enlist their support. Use the occasion as an opportunity to discuss sharing family responsibilities and to strive for family togetherness.
Set realistic expectations
Consider both what the individual with dementia is capable of and what you, as a caregiver, can handle given your demanding role. Then, put celebrations into manageable proportions. This can help decrease stress and head off feelings of depression that stem from unrealistic expectations, both for you and your loved one.
Adapt family gatherings Since crowds, noise, and altering routines can aggravate confusion and other behavioural problems, revising your get-togethers may be in order. For example, instead of entertaining the whole clan, limit the number of attendees at a holiday dinner or spread out several smaller gatherings on different days.
Pare down traditions
With round-the-clock caregiving, it may not be feasible to juggle all of your religious and traditional activities. You can still keep traditions alive; just reduce their number to avoid feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. Ask your father which ones to choose, since it will be another way to involve him.
Enlist extra help
There’s no better time of year to seek respite than the holidays. Consider asking a friend to stay with your father so that you can make preparations, go shopping, bake the cake, or better yet, spoil yourself by relaxing doing something you enjoy. Don't try to be super woman — it will only end in tears and they'll probably be yours!
The most important thing is not to put extra pressure on yourself so keep things as normal as possible for your family and your father. Try to work around his limitations so both you and he do not suffer from unnecessary stress.
If you don’t have help, call Home Instead Senior Care. Respite assistance is one of the company’s most requested services. We know many family caregivers worry that they are the only ones who know how to care for their loved one, or the only one the senior allows to provide care. But we have professional carers, specially trained in Alzheimer's disease and dementia care, who will match to your senior and family circumstances ready to help as much or as little as you need. We'd be happy to put you in touch with others who have used our services in the past if you need some independent reassurance and advice.
Home Instead Senior Care is Ireland's trusted source of home care for seniors. Phone 091 384160 or visit www.homeinstead.ie
