Do I give my eagerly awaited views on bailouts, bonds and our new rulers that speak in broken English accents or do I look around for something to take our minds off the ongoing nightmare?
For my own sanity I’ll (mostly ) steer clear of political issues, there’ll be plenty of time for that when the election gets going in the new year. One bit of good news is that the lads and lassies in the Dail are gearing up for a 33 day break over the Christmas, so no more damage can be done while they’re all away. Somehow I doubt if the IMF/Euro guys will be taking a month off.
Any other interesting news out there? Well as Christmas is approaching I was pleased to see some valuable research has been done on Christmas Crackers and their awful jokes.
Q. What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
A. Dam.
Or
Q. Why did the man get the sack from the orange juice factory?
A. Because he couldn't concentrate.
Two samples of typical jokes you might find in your cracker and probably not enough to improve the humour of the nation. The research has found that the people who find these jokes funniest are undertakers, with accountants and doctors coming in second and third place. Now, who says you don’t learn something new everyday
Nights at the theatre
Maybe it’s due to the recession, but there seems to be a growing interest in local theatre. I headed down to KATS Theatre group in Cleeres last week and had a great night’s entertainment for €10. Another large local cast take to the Watergate stage this weekend with ‘Scrooge,’ an apt production for the times we’re in.
I met Dave Heffernan at the KATS show and he is planning an ambitious production for Kilkenny Musical Society in the spring. The show is ‘The Hired Man’ by Melvyn Bragg and rehearsals are just about to begin. The story is set in the early 1900s and follows the life of John Tallentire, a farm labourer and coal miner. It’s sounds a lot different from the ‘Oklahoma’ and ‘My Fair Lady’ style of musicals and will be one for the diary next year.
David MacWilliams
I skated along to the Watergate last night to see the opening night of a national tour by David MacWilliam’s one man show, ‘Outsiders.’ He forecast the economic collapse before the rest of the economists and opposition politicians joined in. So, if he was right back in 2002/2003 he’s, unfortunately, probably right again now.
He described a government and banking section who, basically haven’t a clue what those at the top do and seem to be making it up as they go along. Some of the anecdotes sound like something from Father Ted, but, unfortunately, this is what happened just a few short years ago.
He told the story of the McInerney Builders and their efforts to buy a field for development back in 2006. They were outbid and were curious to find out who made the winning, overpriced offer. It turned out not to be another building company but a group of dentists. The professional classes of doctors, dentists and solicitors formed these groups all over the country and got in on the building racket, further inflating the price of a house to the ordinary mortgage holder. As MacWilliams said, they saw ‘fellas without even a Junior Cert’ earning huge wages on building sites and reckoned that they, with their 600 points in the Leaving Cert, were entitled to some of the action.
Yes, it all seems a bit ridiculous now, but very few called a halt while it was all going on. One thing I’m sure he never predicted was that large crowds would pay €18 to attend what was basically an economics lecture on a freezing Saturday night. Welcome to post Celtic Tiger Ireland.
and finally...
Another Christmas Cracker joke for all you undertakers, doctors and accountants out there.
Q. What did the inflatable teacher at the inflatable school say to the inflatable child caught holding a pin?
A. You let me down, you let your friends down, you let your school down but most of all... you let yourself down.
