For the past week a lot of questions have been asked about this Sarah Palin. And no, we don't mean ones like "Would you?” No, we're thinking more along the lines of what Senator John McCain was thinking when he picked his running mate.
We imagine the meeting to decide went something like this...
"Hmmm, I think I'll go for a woman," John McCain smiled at his two Republican advisers as he leaned back in his chair.
"But sir," Faceless Aide Number 1 replied, "You're married. It'd hurt your image pretty bad if this gets out."
"No you idiot. I mean for running mate," McCain replied.
"You serious sir?" Faceless Aide Number 2 frowned, "Where the hell are we going to find a female Republican? Not anywhere near here, that's for sure."
"I know. That's why we're going to Alaska. Ever hear of Sarah Palin?"Faceless Aide Number 1 smiled: "Palin, that fine piece of ass... oh, God, no, you can't be serious." His smile turned to a frown."We've been railing on about experience and you want to go for her? This girl is constantly calling herself 'ordinary' to appeal to the voters. Do Americans want someone 'ordinary' in charge?"
"It'd be a big improvement on the last guy," Faceless Aide Number 2 jumped in.
McCain and Faceless Aide Number 1 laughed. "No, but seriously," the Republican candidate wiped the tears from his eye. "I think it'll be an inspired choice and maybe we'll attract some liberal voters after picking a woman?" McCain offered hopefully.
"Ha ha, no," Faceless Aide Number 1 replied, "Picking a female candidate is only seen as progressive if you're on the Left. If you're a conservative people just mock her."
"Ah, of course. Anyway, ring Alaska and tell Palin she's in. Oh, and get the vetting started," McCain commanded as he rose from his chair. It took a lot out of him so he decided to sit down again.
"What if we find anything juicy on her?" Faceless Aide Number 2 asked.
"Ah, who cares. We'll just say anyone that criticises her utter lack of experience, over the top conservatism, non-existent foreign policy expertise, is a big sexist!" McCain replied.
"You know what, I love it," Faceless Aide Number 1 said as he picked up the phone.
